you don't know how lovely you are
by jackiekennedy
Summary: This is the easiest it's ever been, to pretend that she could actually be his.


_Hi, hello all. How are you doing? It seems that Skins has easily become a new obsession of mine. That being said, so has the potential of Alo and Mini. It's a new OTP in my midst! Anywhoo, this was just an idea that was circling around my head for a bit, and I just needed to get it off my chest. I hope you all enjoy! _

* * *

He's never known how to get over a girl.

Maybe because he's never had any reason to. Still, it's strange how some people can stay with you more than others.

He takes two lazy steps forward, scratches his bare stomach and leaves three pink visible lines. He's never really felt this way before. He doesn't know how to sort it out - he's not sure if he _wants_ to - but if he could pinpoint the very bane of his distress, he's looking at her right now: all legs and pretty and confidence walking down the hallway with that look that confirms she knows just how much power she holds.

She's like a cut that snuck underneath his skin that's starting to bruise.

...

He wonders if maybe she's forgotten about him in the way he could never forgot about her.

But then he thinks she doesn't even know him enough to forget him.

...

"Fucking hell. Nice ride, farm boy."

He's not sure whether she's making fun of him or not, her side resting against the blue caravan with that golden moon smirking at her lips.

"Nice legs." His voice is easy, practiced. "And where are all your groupies?"

She averts her gaze and stares a bit to the sky. "Haven't you heard? I'm all grown up and independent now." And then she blinks back towards him, like she's left Nick and Liv and all of them up in the stars without a second's thought.

"Ah." His mouth forms an 'o'. "I think I like you better now."

She laughs, like she didn't expect him to say something like that. And then she turns her body slightly away from him, leaning against the van as she directs her voice to the sky, "I never liked me much."

...

Sometimes he feels like the best thing he could ever do in life is just sit there and maybe exist. Because Rich has Grace and they're in love, Matty has Liv and Matty has Franky and Nick _had_ Mini and now he has beer and a golden angel - and all Alo has is a spot on the ground and some spliff burning his throat.

And what about Mini?

Nick is drunk and shares a laugh. "I think I ruined her."

His fingernails dig deep into his legs. "Maybe."_ No, I'll beat you to it._

_...  
_

They're on a roof. Something. Something where she's sitting down and dangling her legs and one sudden movement and she could slip over the edge. And that's where he sees, where maybe it all makes sense: she knows what it is like to just sit there and feel everything and nothing at the same time.

Maybe he likes that they both feel useless.

_Still_. "Don't fall," he warns.

"I can't have it all." She doesn't look at him. "I used to think, maybe I could, just not all at once. But now I feel like I can't have anything."

He scratches the back of his neck. "Look, maybe you should swing your legs back here or something because I'm getting nervous that you're gonna - "

She glances back at him, her voice carried away by the wind. "You cannot be all that I have left."

...

That's how it's going to be. And it's different because this is not Rich and his loyalties and this is not Franky and her reliability, this is Mini and and this is either everything or it is nothing. She's all Mini, all the time.

He doesn't even realize that it's starting to happen. She will forever be the one that changes how he categorizes his life: "Before Mini, After Mini."

...

"You're doing it again."

"What?"

"Should I leave, Farm Boy?"

"Sorry," he turns his head away and hears her shuffling next to him. "I was just thinking about… I didn't mean to look at you, I just remembered… sometimes I think you have fucking _stars_ in your eyes, I swear."

And she's a little taken back, and her voice stammers slightly when she tries to peg _which_ Mini he was talking about _exactly_, and he sort of shrugs and tries not to look at her when he says, "I've only known one you."

"What?"

"Mini - "

"You don't know me."

And the sorry truth cuts through him like glass, and she's got all the equipment required to protect the wall she's built around herself, but the way her eyes are shining up to him read, no one's ever needed _me_ before.

...

He finds a bag of weed underneath the tub while he's doing some mandatory cleaning. He slides in the bath, fully clothed with no running water, and tilts his head back against the porcelain, cradling the sack near his chest. He feels the strangest desire to just cry.

...

Grace and Rich are Romeo and Juliet. Alo and Mini are just two suckers who got left behind while everyone was moving forward.

Still, he finds himself outside her window at three in the morning, tossing rocks in the middle of her garden. Only a handful of the roses are blooming; the rest are dead, the stars glimmer beyond the thick veneer, and the moon is three quarters full.

"Farm boy," she hisses from the other side. Her hair is down and livid with anger, and maybe the only reason he's even there is to just _see_ her. "What the fuck are you doing?"

"Alo."

"What?"

"My name... is _Alo_."

"I know that, shit dick," she scowls, and he chucks another pebble to the floor. "That still doesn't answer what the _fuck_ are you doing trying to break my window?"

"I could know you," he teeters, and it's the first indication how pissed drunk he is. "If you weren't so damn closed off all the time. I could fucking know you, I could… you could have someone on your side."

Her voice is smooth, like a skater over ice. "I don't need anybody."

"You don't have to always pretend to be so brave, Mini."

"You should go home."

"You just don't like being fragile."

"Fuck off."

"You don't like how simply you can break."

"Get the _fuck_ out of my garden."

"I think you're scared."

"No," she shakes her head finally; last straw. "I don't get scared easily."

"I didn't say easily, but someone still does all the same."

She shuts her windows close but leaves the blinds open.

...

This is the easiest it's ever been, to pretend that she could actually be his.

He sits legs crossed, right in the middle of her dying roses, and laughs along with the moonlight.

He'll sit there and just _exist_ and wait until sunrise, and he wonders when his world first span off its axis and started revolving around her instead.

* * *

**I'm very much in love with these two. Thank you for reading, and please leave a review if you have the time! :)**


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